Why Comparing Yourself to Others Helps You to Achieve Your Goals
Comparison isn’t the thief of joy — it’s the gift of inspiration.
Forget what you’ve heard in the past — comparison isn’t something you need to avoid. Comparison is a tool you use to realize your dreams.
You can make comparison work for you, not against you.
A healthy comparison is looking at good work, or even bad work, and analyzing its parts — Gregory Ciotti
Changing your perspective allows you to see that someone else’s successes have nothing to do with whether you succeed or fail. You can’t take someone else’s victories personally as if they’re diminishing your own.
Consider comparison as a guide which helps you to make an effective plan and gives you the tools you need to put it into practice.
Remind yourself there’s not a specific amount of success, and the people who reach it first aren’t the only winners.
Everything is still available for you if you want it.
I’ve lived along the edges of an artistic and financially comfortable life for a while now, and almost daily, I see friends and acquaintances sharing fantastic news of their book deals, acting roles, dazzling vacations, and beach-homes.
They make my badly-in-need-of-paint-house, my rare vacation to Las Vegas, and my writing look s sad.
I’ve had my moments of envy and self-doubt where I wondered if I should give up, and I’ve made everything a competition that I was sure to lose. I took every piece of good news as if it was highlighting how I’ve failed.
Comparing ourselves to others is very human behavior.
I couldn’t stop myself from comparing myself, but I could change my mindset around it and see comparison as something positive.
I started to be grateful for what I had, and I’d look at other people’s success as evidence that it was doable.
Comparison doesn’t have to be something that makes you feel like a failure; it can be something that’s an impetus to pursuing the things you want out of life. It’s motivation with an assurance that whatever you wish to achieve can be done.
Comparison reaffirms that getting what you want is not only possible but probable.
A few months back, during a coffee-date, a friend who told me about all the great things happening in her life. I didn’t feel discouraged by her success — I felt empowered and encouraged.
I was excited because I believe I was next. Good things were bound to come my way.
If my friends could achieve their dreams, then so could I. Nothing magical had happened; no one had granted them three wishes or gave them some gold coins.
Their success could happen to anyone; they weren’t the luckiest people in the world or the most talented.
The only extraordinary element of their success was the gift of being able to continue believing that they’d achieve their goals even when everything indicated the opposite.
Successful people keep working at what they want, take advantage of the opportunities presented to them, and keep going no matter how many obstacles are in their way.
Comparison is negative when you give in to envy and resentment, or when you use it to blindly copy people. Comparison becomes positive when it shines a light in what you could take initiative on, or what qualities successful people foster that you don’t — Tesia Blake
Let other people’s successes motivate you.
There isn’t a small amount of success out there, and if someone has a lot of success, it doesn’t mean they got your portion of it. There’s plenty to go around, and being happy for someone doesn’t take anything away from you.
They did it; you can do it too. You may even have an easier time of it. You can learn from their mistakes or their knowledge.
Use them to inspire you.
Visualizing what you want is an excellent method to help you get it.
I have a friend who was in a sketch group with me and is a very successful T.V. writer. I have witnessed her professional journey and have seen how hard she worked for it.
She’s earned her good life, and while I don’t want to be a T.V. writer, I can continue to learn from her and keep going when there’s nothing or no one to boost my confidence or tell me I’m good.
She has no idea what an inspiration she is to me.
The only believer you need is you. Eventually, you’ll get other people to support you and who believe in your abilities and talents, but for right now, be your own hype-person.
Other people’s successes show you it can be done:
You’re not going into this without any idea if the goals you have are achievable. You know the steps to take, the skills you need to have, and how you can prepare in advance.
If you look for similarities between you and the people that made it, you’ll be surprised how many there are.
Look at not only what they did to get where they did but what they didn’t do and decide what you can do differently.
By learning from their successes and their mistakes, you can develop your unique game plan.
When you use comparison as a way to inspire action and creativity rather than despair and negativity: you’ll end up being happier, more focused, and productive.
And when your dreams have become a reality, you’ll be able to create new ones and have new people to emulate.
