10 Surprising Reasons Why Narcissists Apologize
It’s not because they’re genuinely sorry.
“I’m sorry I said you were a terrible writer,” my mother said.
It’s a rare thing when my mother apologizes to me or anyone, so when she does, it feels more like a warning shot than her admitting she made a mistake.
My mother is a narcissist who manipulates people to do what she wants, has a disturbing lack of empathy, and is both intensely self-centered and comically lacking in self-awareness.
Why had she apologized? Did she think I was an excellent writer? No, she wanted me to stay and take care of her instead of going home. She felt if she apologized, it would soften my resolve, and I’d agree to become her caregiver.
Her opinion hadn’t changed, just her endgame.
Narcissists prefer a nonverbal type of apology where they take an action which repairs your positive image of them, but a reparative gesture isn’t always available as a choice.
What makes a strong apology?
For an apology to be successful, the person needs to have at least a small idea of what they did wrong, feel remorse about doing it, and have the desire to change so as not to do it again.
